Holding your anchor
A tool to settle your nervous system
It’s Mental Health Awareness Week here in the UK.
So in a series of short articles I’m sharing a set of tools that can help to resolve symptoms arising from anxiety, stress, shock, and trauma by helping to settle your nervous system.
I shared an initial set of tools in an article I published in mental health awareness week last year.
All of these exercises share the goal of helping us attune to a state of calm in our body, to sensations of safety or goodness, however small they may be.
We often have resources that can help induce such feelings in us— things that help us to feel present, grounded, and safe: a significant person, pet, or relationship, a routine, time or place that nourishes or relaxes us, that brings us joy or strengthens our sense of safety and stability.
You can use this sort of resource as an anchor.
To identify something that can be an achor for you, start by sitting comfortably.
Take a moment to feel yourself connected to your seat/the floor. Then ask yourself:
What is it that makes you feel safe and happy?
If nothing comes up for you, it’s ok. Your anchor can be:
- a person — someone in your life who makes or has made you feel safe and welcome,
- a thing — something you do to nourish, relax, or bring you joy in the moment,
- a place — somewhere you feel or felt safe and happy,
- a time — a time in your life when you felt happy and at peace.
As you recall your anchor, notice what happens inside you — what feelings sensations come up for you? Just notice whatever shows up for you.
Take your time. Recall as much (or as little) as you like about your anchor.
Make it as real as possible in your mind. Think about any colours, smells, sounds, or textures you associate with your anchor.
As you hold your anchor in your mind, settle into the feelings it invokes in your body. Connect with the physical experience your anchor brings up for you now and hold your attention there.
Pay attention to these sensations and spend time hanging out with them, as this can help strengthen your sense of stability and safety.
You can then draw upon your anchor for support in times of need. Your anhor can work as a safe haven, a place you can return to help reestablish a state of calm.
If at any time, finding an anchor starts to feel complicated, just pause.
You can switch and think of something else at any time.
Keep it simple:
What is it that makes you feel at peace?
What brings you a sense of goodness?
And don’t worry, it really doesn’t matter what you use as an anchor.
For example, in thinking of a person, they could be a friend, a family member, a neighbour, a pet, a nurturing, protective or wise figure, a spiritual guide, someone is who is no longer alive, someone you know well, or someone you just met: anyone, at any time who makes you makes you feel safe and happy.
The beauty of finding your anchor is that you can call upon it and hold to it anytime you want to. If ever you’re feeling anxious, you can take some time out, and shift your attention to your anchor and the physical felt sense it brings you.
Whilst finding your anchor involves visual imagery, it also entails a visual kinesthetic sensory experience, where you establish feelings of safety in your body. This teaches the nervous system that calmness can follow after an experience of anxiety, shock, or stress.
The key is to ground the visualisation in your body. That way, it is not just visual imagery, but rather a visual kinesthetic sensory experience. It is not just thinking of a safe place, but experiencing the feeling of safety in your body now. This can then give also you easier access in future to positive internal sensory experiences of inner strength, support, safety, peace, happiness, connection.
